I grew up in a sexist family. They subscribed to an extreme sexism that justified rape and torture of little girls and women. It was the worst kind of sexism. My father was very clear that all things feminine were not just bad, but evil. Of course, his idea of the feminine was fed by society, so even his choice of what to hate was distorted.
He let me know that my body was evil. My body caused him to rape me. My body caused him to have desires that he could not control. My body was a source of shame and guilt because I was a girl. Keep in mind that I was younger than 10 years old at the time. Continue reading →
I have yet to meet an honest mother who isn’t completely insecure about motherhood. It is the hardest job on this planet. Motherhood targets our triggers. To put it a different way, it brings up everything that scares us to death. For some of us, we are scared more easily than others. Anxiety can be inhibiting when it comes to making sound parenting decisions. But I think the most grounded mothers are insecure at some points.
From the beginning, I have been convinced I am damaging my children in every way. I am too overprotective. I am not watching them closely enough. My discipline is too inconsistent. I am not spending enough time with them. I am not pushing them hard enough. They are not involved in enough extra-curricular activities. I am not feeding them right. I am missing out on their one true calling by not embracing who they are. I am too tired to dress up like a Disney character and run around the house with them, so they will never develop a healthy sense of self. Continue reading →